Victoria Hates Christina
My candidates for Congress Mammal don't like each other. I mean really don't like each other. Every day they send me postcards and letters telling me how bad the other person is and why I shouldn't vote for them. Their names are Victoria and Christina. Yesterday,...
How I Got Banned From Walgreens
I've had writer's block for 2 days. Maybe I got spoiled by the weather last week. You would think the turning leaves would inspire lots of words, but not so much. So, I decided to write about writer's block. It's kind of like word constipation, but there's no literary...
The Department of Obscure Questions
Due to a keen sense of needing to know useless trivia (along with not having anything else to write about today), I have decided to answer a deeply troubling question sent in by Outstanding Citizen Herbert Schwump of Austin, TX. Mr. Schwump writes: Dear Jeff, In what...
I’m Not Dead Yet
Yesterday, I got an odd message from an old co-worker. It said, "Hey. Haven't talked in a while. Just got a text from someone. Are you ok?" Sounds cryptic, doesn't it. Could be a scam, someone posing as my friend. Or it could be the CIA playing mind games on me. Or it...
They Live Next Door To You
Have you heard of the Nextdoor app? It's a website/phone app that allows you to spy on connect with your neighbors. It sounds like a lovely idea, right? Bring us together, promote community, and all that. It's not. Instead, it's a daily confirmation...
Postcards From My Congress Mammal
It's only a short time until the 2020 election. And while everyone is focused on the Presidential race, our local politicians are desperately trying to make sure we don't forget them. So, every day when I take my dog to the mailbox, I find another postcard from a...