Recently, a town in Florida accidentally sold its water tower. It seems the parcel of land it occupied was once split in two, but not the actual deed and other legal paperwork. The gentleman who bought the land and discovered the error then transferred the land back to the city. And here comes the fun part. They still charged him $10 for the transfer of title.
This got me thinking (which is dangerous). First, why didn’t the city wave the fee? He could have held them up for years over the water tower. Instead, he did the right thing. Let that be a lesson to us all: The right thing, the wrong thing, and the naughty thing will always be taxed. Choose wisely.
Secondly, if the government can be throwing around property willy nilly like this, why can’t it begin to unload some of the things “we the people” don’t really need? Maybe clear up some of that government debt? For example, do we really need two Dakotas? Nobody can ever figure out which one is which anyway. I say, “Sell a Dakota!”
I decided to take this concept to my Congress Mammal. His administrative assistant hung up on me. So, I emailed and got a form letter response back, with a list of mental health care providers I should contact.
I thought maybe this was above his pay grade, so I contacted my Senator. His response included an appeal for me NOT to claim I was from Indiana if by some miracle somebody interviewed me on the topic.
Then, I came up with an even better idea! Currently, the U.S. government has a website where they auction off government land. Why not turn this into a lottery? When you file your taxes in April, you’re automatically entered to win one of these properties!
At this very moment, there is an air force base in Michigan that is up for auction. The current bid is only $10K. Can you believe only one person has bid on this? Now you might be asking yourself, “Self, what would I do with an air force base?” And that’s exactly the silly question my wife asked if I somehow managed to acquire it.
What wouldn’t you do with it? Amusement park? Secret hideout? Bed and breakfast? UFO welcome center? The possibilities are endless.
I’m going back to my Congress Mammal. I think I might get a better reception to this idea. If not, I’m starting a Go Fund Me to buy the air force base.
Carry on, Citizens!