I was on the way to a concert recently, and I saw a black car with a black license plate that read “DEDGIRL.” She even had a bumper sticker that read “All Flesh Rots.” I couldn’t see inside the car (tinted windows, of course), so I have no idea if she was an aspiring mortician or just a truly committed Goth.
I wonder if her house is painted black? Do Goths have black toilets? This is the kind of stuff that keeps my mind occupied.
Anyway, the car reminded me of a post I wrote way back in 2009 titled Business Goth. The concept never took off, which is really a shame. But here is that article for your amusement:
Business Goth
I was searching for a new look for the office, and it occurred to me that Business Goth really hasn’t taken off in the American workplace. Too bad. I think Goth should be the look of choice of people who hate their jobs. Not that I hate mine, I just have a lot of black apparel and enough Cure singles on my iTunes to pull it off.
Of course, there are other business looks that really haven’t taken off either. Such as Business Scott. Or Business Bavarian. Or even Business Pirate. Too bad. I think with all the layoffs and whatnot, we need a costumed business environment to take the edge off the fact that at any given moment you may lose your job, house, and 401k, or that this sentence might actually come to an end. Which, of course, leads us back to Goth.
So, I’m declaring next Monday to be Business Goth Day. Wear black clothes, dye your hair black, and paint your nails. Then blast some Cult on your work computer (I’m thinking She Sells Sanctuary from the Love album) and tell your boss that “only by brooding in solitude can you truly explore the darkness that encompasses your heart as you fill out your expense reports.”
Let me know how that goes. And send me a picture.
Carry on, Citizens!
