Welcome, Citizens!

Thank you for stopping by my website! I'm glad your here. This site was built with the latest 5 senses technology, so if your browser supports 5 senses web surfing, you should be smelling buffalo wings right now. Also, you feel the gentle rocking of the waves. If you don't smell wings, your browser might be out of date. Or, you've stumbled upon the website of a slightly crazy person. It could go either way.

Anyway, thanks for stopping by. Here are some of the amazing and wonderful things you can do while you're here:

  • Learn about my books. I've written 3 books with commas, periods, and other punctuation. In fact, some of the nouns and verbs were accessorized well enough to earn good reviews from book reviewers, Amazon reviewers, and several recently released prisoners.
  • Sign up for my newsletter. You will get updates, be registered to win free stuff, and be the envy of your friends. I will never sell or share your info. Pinkie swear.
  • Order books for your book club. Want to read one of my books with your book club? We will cut you a special deal for 6 or more books and include a personalized inscription.
  • Leave me a message. Want to tell me how much you hated loved my last book? Want to write me a poem in Mandarin? Want to send me pictures of you in a giant sombrero? Fire away!