A Better Day Job

A Better Day Job

French physicists have more fun than you and I. You see, they're not burdened by the mundane pursuits of other physicists. Instead of trying to find new energy sources, applying quantum mechanics to daily life, or solving space travel, they are hard at work making...

Renovation Probation

Renovation Probation

I'm feeling discombobulated. In fact, our whole house is discombobulated. My dog is stressed. My wife is restless. And everything is piled in corners. The US Department of Home Renovation forced us at gunpoint to rip out our carpet and replace it. I bet you didn't...

The Big Potato

The Big Potato

Put Cyprus on your list of Must Visit Places. I know I have, now that I've learned they have a monument to rival the Eiffel Tower and the Statue of Liberty. It's called The Big Potato. That's not a typo. The town of Xylophagou (also not a typo) erected a 16-foot tall...

Death Cooties & Alluvial Deposits

Death Cooties & Alluvial Deposits

A while back, I proposed that we needed to rename COVID. I felt "Mandalorian Death Cooties" was a much better title. It sounds exotic and menacing. COVID sounds like either the rec center at a small private college or the answer to some calculus question I got wrong...

My Brain Has a Gremlin

My Brain Has a Gremlin

I think my brain has a gremlin. And that might not be a bad thing. It's helped me come up with some good story ideas. One of those is available for the first time today! More on that in a moment. First, did you see the movie Gremlins? Every time one of the nice furry...

The Euphemism is on Fire

The Euphemism is on Fire

A few weeks ago in Houston, a woman was playing a "gaming machine." A gaming machine is a euphemism for gambling, much like "circle back" is a euphemism for "I really don't want to talk about this right now."  Anyway, she was playing away at her euphemism and lost. I...